Hi, I’m Daniel Hamzah
Hello there! My name is Daniel Hamzah. But that’s not my real name. I was previously known as COMET. I was born on February 4, 2010 at K-Mart Department Store, Richmond, Australia. So you see, I am only a baby. 6 days old. But I can talk like a grown man. That’s because I’m special. Look at me there, sitting like a tough man on the grass at the Princess Park. I’m a cute, red, little Aussie baby, ain’t I? Haha. Oh yes, I am a bicycle. In my owner’s manual, you can find my model number – 42490. I was described as a 66cm-men bicycle. And if you are wondering how I was assembled recently, you can download a full instruction manual from this link.
Please don’t tell me you’re surprised. My Master, Cekmi, is a crazy old boy. He has this weird habit of naming his stuff with some funny names. Remember Siti Norkiah Norman, Miss Cekia & Mr. Ceklet? Yep, he’s a psychotic, delusional man who likes to impersonate dead objects and speak on their behalf. Creepy, huh? Adding to this madness, he also likes to refer to himself as a third person in his own blog. And right now, here we go again. Cekmi is rambling through me – a talking bike.
Alright. So, Cekmi wants to call me Daniel. Hmm, I thought my original name is cute enough. It rhymes with Cekmi, right? Comet. Cekmi. Comet. Cekmi. Isn’t that something? Haha. But I think Cekmi wanted to honour me with something more stylish. Something more humanely. Something that reminds him of his beautiful past life. I heard that my name reminds him of someone called Danny Hussainy. Does that ring a bell to you? Please let me know in the comment box. I don’t know who the hell he was in the past, but I’m sure he must be an important legacy for Cekmi. But honestly, I’m quite flattered to have Cekmi’s family name next to mine. I’m sure his Ayoh in Kelantan will be proud of me. Of course, I’m Cekmi’s long-lost little brother in Melbourne, so to speak.
Anyway, you guys should know that I’m not an expensive thing. I’m just Comet, a relatively simple and modest brand for a mountain bike. My other rich friends displayed elegantly at a fancy professional bike shop can cost up to a few thousand dollars. Quality and tough brands, says the glossy brochure. I was only a cheap bike assembled at a cheap store. But I’m not intimidated. Rest assured, I’ve got everything that a beginner cyclist needs. With a light weight alloy frame, a quick release seat, alloy rims, a dual suspension, an 18-speed twist shift, linear pull brakes, I’m specially designed for the amateurish Cekmi. And I know, in Cekmi’s eyes, I’m not just a bike. I represent his free soul, wild imagination and childish curiosity. If I’m dead after a year or two, I’m sure Cekmi will dedicate a bench for me at the Royal Botanic Gardens.
By the way, I remember Cekmi’s first ride with me last week. When I saw him for the first time, I was a bit worried. Can this petite boy ride with me safely around Melbourne? Frankly speaking, he looked unfit and weak. And indeed, he made a very bad first impression on me. He took a big risk when he took me to the Melbourne streets. He almost gave up during his first ride from Richmond to his place in Carlton. It’s only 4 kilometres, but it felt like 40 kilometres to him. “This is so damn tiring, Daniel!” he said that aloud to me when he stopped again and dragged me along the Victoria Street. Breathing so hard, he looked at the other experienced bike-riders passing him like a fast train – the tough young men and the strong old women – and I could sense a serious embarrassment from his red sweaty face. Poor Cekmi, he underestimated bike-riding in Melbourne. He thought all the bike paths are flat and easy. But he was so wrong. His first bike-riding experience in Melbourne didn’t turn out to be as Manly as he had ambitiously thought.
But knowing Cekmi, I know he would be just as stubborn as he has always been. He is not the type who could easily say, “That’s it!” He would not be discouraged by his first pathetic attempt at bike-riding. I know, both of us will have a superb, healthy, wonderful time together soon. Don’t worry my dear Master, I’ll be your good little brother in Melbourne. Muah!